I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
