you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
