Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
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