i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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