You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
