is your mom at the bar?
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
