you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
