if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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