I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
