did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
