I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
