I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
