I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
