I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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