He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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