even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
high people should be assigned attendants
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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