the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
