he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
