Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize