This girl is more easily done than said...
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
