turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
