Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
