i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
