Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
