Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
