If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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