We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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