my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
