Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize