apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize