And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Randomize
