we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I skipped work to stalk him.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize