I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Randomize
