Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
the day after is always just damage control
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Randomize
