If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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