After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize