Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
