do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
What drink are we having for lunch?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
we're so committed to being not committed
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
