Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize