yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Randomize
