The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
