At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
