she woke up with a sticky ear
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 607 share tweet
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
