we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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