Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
