And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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