I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
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