dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
