she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
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