i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize